No sooner I get into the process suggested to calm my overtaxed mind, I get into sleep mode. Obviously, when I get up, I feel temporarily relaxed. But soon after my monkey mind comes into active play. Tell me where I am going wrong. Asked a disciple, who is serious about getting over the limitations of his mind. “Getting into sleep mode during the process is not desirable”. I answered. “Why then is it happening?” He asked. Well, as you close your eyes, you get cut off from all that you would be consciously watching in the outer world as well as the self-excited thoughts within, which includes lot of negative impressions. Nothing to process, mind gets into sleep mode. “How do I get over this syndrome?” He then asked.
While introducing you to the 8 fold course of “Patanjali Yoga Sutra”, I had explained that meditation proper begins by getting into state of ‘Pratyahara’. I had also explained the significance and application of Pratyahara. The process calls for getting disengaged from waking state consciousness and instead turning your attention inwards. Fact remains that you have ignored the most important part of the process, which is why you get into sleep mode. Should you look within, your sub-conscious mind will come into full play. That will bring into focus random thoughts picked up in the immediate past, many of them unpleasant and inconsequential. Those thoughts keep alive your grieving mind. Also, persistent desires and feelings may keep knocking you. These thoughts engage your attention so much, that you are hardly have the space necessary to process any fresh thoughts objectively, and with obvious consequences.
Remember, mind-calming process is true to the calling of Pratyahara. Should you follow the process correctly, mind will have a task in hand. It has to witness the inflowing thoughts, but at the same time train it to remain disengaged from them. Following which, those thoughts will go out of reckoning over a period of time. Consequently, you will not only feel relaxed, but also fresh mind-space will be available to process any fresh thoughts objectively. And that makes the difference. I could make out that this fellow is not able to turn his attention inwards. To facilitate that, I suggested him to keep his attention on his breath cycle during the process – inbreath and outbreath both included.
The next time the person visited me, informed that he no longer gets into sleep mode. “In fact, I am able to see a pattern in my thought flow, which makes me understand and acknowledge my mental traits. I have realised that I carry a sense of fear and insecurity. I also suffer from a sense of ‘identity crisis’ which tempts me prove my point whatever way I can. Where does it come from? Also, I wish to realise my dream perceptions fast, which is not happening on expected lines. You have to now guide me how to resolve them and also realise my potential fast.” The person asked.
The sense of fear and identity crisis has actually become a part of your psyche, coming as them may as reflection of your unpleasant memory imprints picked up during early childhood. The Sun, which is marked with your identity and confidence level is in debility, and is placed opposite its dire enemy Saturn, which too is in debility. It implies that during early childhood, your parents would have tried to forcefully discipline you. You would have been subject to beating and chastised on every occasion you committed some mistake or when your performance level was not on expected lines. Your parent’s intent can’t be questioned. But instead of handling you with a sense of love, they forcefully tried to impose their whip on you. The irony of the whole situation is that born with Aries lagna ruled by fiery Mars, and prominently placed, it was difficult for you to digest commandeering. In the process, your confidence level got down and developed a sense of fear, which with time became a part of your psyche. Now that you are on your own, there is no relevance of those past happenings. Once, this thought gets registered in your mind, you will get over this hang. He began working on suggested lines, and soon he overcame this problem.
This way, with time, he went on identifying and acknowledging his mental limitations one by one, and then got over them. As he got over his negatives, his performance level too began to improve.